Fears and Sneers
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: Steph wants to know what Paul was afraid of as a child. Paul just wants to know the score to the basketball game. They meet in the middle. Kind of. If, you know, hooking up with the game on in the background is the middle, then yeah, they meet in the middle. - One-shot.


"What were you afraid of as a kid?"

Paul shifted a bit, on the bed, though he kept his eyes on the television. "What?"

"I asked," Steph said as she sat there, legs crossed, beside him. She, however, was not the least bit interested in the Hornets nor the Knicks and was honestly only allowing him to watch them because he'd been kind enough to go out and get her the exact dinner she wanted that night. "About what you were afraid of as a child."

That time his dark eyes drifted to her for a moment before returning back to the television. "Gourds."

If the air she huffed out her nose was any indication, Steph was _not_ impressed with his answer.

"Paul-"

"What?" He was growing a bit annoyed and it was showing through his tone. "Steph, I'm watching-"

"There." As the Hornets went up by ten, the Knicks called for timeout. "A commercial."

Paul only grumbled a bit, before looking up at her. He was lounging, on the bed, leaning against one arm as he laid facing her. "What was it then that you wanted?"

"I asked what you're afraid of."

"Gourds."

"You're being an ass."

"Am not." It was his turn to huff out some air. "Gourds are fucking terrifying to a little kid. They got all those weird bumps on them and your mom hands you one, right? Around Halloween? And wants you to take a cute picture? Fuck that. That thing looks like the damn skin of that witch in that story you just heard!"

Stephanie, actively refusing to watch the basketball game, had a magazine before her, which she'd been flipping through. At the man's words, however, she'd taken to just staring at him. And, upon his completion, she gave him the stink eye.

"You're so stupid."

"It's not stupid. And it's not funny, so stop laughing."

"I'm not laughing."

Or at least she wasn't trying to, as she attempted to give him a hardcore glare.

As a result with most of her fiances jokes, however, Steph had fallen victim to ever present giggles and, turning her head from him, she took a deep breath in an attempt to regain control before facing him once more. When she did, she said, "You're not being helpful, Paul."

"To what, baby?" Blinking up at her, he stared dead into her cold blues. "Hmm?"

"To learn more stuff about one another. Stuff we haven't learned yet." She glanced at the television, but it was still in the middle of a commercial. Glancing back at him once more, she said, "We're getting married very soon-"

"Steph, we got engaged a little over a month ago." He reached over then, to the magazine before her, and tapped at an article. "Focus on these stupid tabloid relationships. Not ours. At least not for the next hour or so, huh? Till my game goes off."

"I wanna get married in the fall."

"The fall?"

"The fall."

"You mean when there's gourds around?"

"I'm gonna kill you."

"You must be trying to! Not only do I gotta marry you-"

"You proposed to me, jerk," she remarked, which would have had some more force behind it if she didn't glance down at the engagement ring resting on her finger, staring at it fondly. "I didn't make you do anything."

"-but you're gonna decorate the table with tons of gourds. I just know you will. You McMahons are tricky that way."

"If you're not going to be serious with me-"

"I'm being very serious. You put gourds on the tables in the reception hall and I'm getting an annulment."

"-I'll just ask your mother."

"My mother?"

"Mmmhmm. About what you were afraid of as a child."

Groaning then, he said, "Stephanie, what difference does it make? Why do you suddenly need to know this?"

"Because," she said as the game was back on and Paul's eyes visibly went away from her. "These are things that we haven't found out about one another in the time we've been together so far and are very important."

"Important to what?"

"Uh, the child I'm going to be having."

That one got his attention back. "The what?"

"In the future." And that one got an eye roll as well as some mutters from the man. "The children, in fact."

"What does me being afraid of gourds-"

"You were not."

"-have to do with our children?"

"Well, your real childhood fears-"

"I'm telling you gourds, woman."

"-might transfer over to our child," she reasoned, smiling a bit, from thoughts of these future kids. "And if we're having five-"

"I told you, I'd give you two. That I would raise two. Whatever else you're going on about-"

"-more than likely," she kept right up, "at least some of your fears will be the same as one of the kids. Same with me."

She didn't have his interest then, not really, but she did kinda have his attention.

"What were you afraid of then? Steph?"

"Mmmm," she hummed as she thought. "You know, all the silly things, when I was kid. Bugs and things. Spiders. But my most serious, irrational fear, was definitely the dentist."

"The dentist?"

Nodding, she said, "Shane would tell me before every visit, when I was young, that if my teeth were really bad, the dentist would have to pull them all out. But if they were too clean, the dentist would get annoyed, because there was nothing for her to clean, and then she'd pull all of them out. So I would stress, you know? Before each visit, I'd worry that my teeth were either too clean or too dirty."

Paul blinked. "Well, uh, Steph, I really don't think memories of a mean older brother are hereditary."

"I wasn't saying that. You just asked what I was afraid of, so I told you. I'm trying to figure out what, like, innate fears you had."

"Like...of the dark?"

"Sure. Were you afraid of the dark?"

"Me? Afraid?" Snort. "Steph, I was giving examples."

"What's your mother's number again?"

Paul huffed a bit, again, before saying, "For a very short period of time, sure, fine, I was a bit fearful of the dark."

"Thought so."

"But I used to sneak out of my room late at night, right? And go into the living room? I'd hide behind the couch when my dad would watch horror movies. I was scarred for life of the dark."

"Did you sleep in your parents' bed a lot?"

Scoff. "Where would you get-"

"You know, I do need to talk to your mother about-"

"All seriousness," he told her as Steph just grinned down at him. "It really wasn't something I did. Go and sleep in my parents' bed."

"Me neither," his wife agreed. "So hopefully we won't have to deal with that. My parents had, like, an off limits rule thing."

"What do you mean?"

"Like, you know, you couldn't go in their room without being invited to."

He made a face. "They invite you into their room?"

"Not… Like if they wanted you in there, like if my mother was showing me her jewelry or something, you could go in there because she told you that you could. Or if Vince was gonna let me pick out his tie-"

"Is that something you did?" he asked with a bit of a snicker, mocking then as he added, "That's so cute."

"-then I could go in there," she kept up. "But, like, any other time? No way. You'd get in trouble. I mean, who wants to go in their parents' room anyways?"

"If they put it off limits? Specifically? Me."

"Figures."

Again, Paul snickered. "Wonder what sort of freaky shit they were doing in there that they didn't want you to see."

"Gross."

"Just wondering."

"It's just a privacy thing. Not a...they're freaks thing."

"Mmmm."

"What?"

"Just know your father, is all."

"Paul-"

"My kids could come into my room if they wanted something. To get me. They wouldn't be banned," he remarked. "But then, I'm not a freak."

"They're not-"

"I mean, there's a definite knocking on the door thing that needs to be established. And if Vince told you not to come in, you just didn't, that would be pretty normal."

"Having privacy in your own room is normal," Steph kept insisting. "Like, I wasn't allowed in Shane's room unless he specifically told me I could go in there. And vice versa."

"What the hell were you people doing to one another that you needed such stringent boundary laws?"

"You're telling me," she asked then, "that in your family, anyone could just walk into anyone's bedroom?"

"Why would you? But...yeah, I guess. I don't ever remember specifically being told that, if I went into my sister's bedroom, I'd get the belt or something," he kept up. "I'd go in there if I needed something or whatever. I mean, I might have, like, hid in her closet before, to try and jump out and scare her, but it never got me banned from going somewhere. What type of restrictive house did you grow up in, babe?"

"It's normal!"

"Not for me." He started toying with the blanket they were resting atop. "If my dad was taking a nap after work, when I was a really little kid, he'd like for me to go into his room and sit by him and like, nap with him or color or whatever. And if I needed my mother, but she was already in bed, I could go get her. I mean, fuck, where did you go when you had a bad dream or something?'

"Well, I could get them then. I just...couldn't go into their room."

"Because they were freaks."

"You know, this is why I ask your mother about your life instead of you."

"Why? Because she won't delve into the disgusting world that is Vince and Linda's sex life?"

"I'm about to make you go find another hotel."

"You can't make me buy another room for the night."

"Did I say room? I said a whole other hotel."

He laughed then, at her, before pushing up a bit. Just enough so that he could fall into her, Steph falling a bit at this, back into the pillows behind them.

"P-Paul-"

"You were trying to ply info outta me and I got the motherload from you," he remarked. "So not only did you get to pick your father's ties for him-"

"You're squishing me," Steph grumbled as he buried his head in her chest, though the fact she was kicking her magazine away then, to stretch her legs out, showed she was far more comfortable with the position than she was letting on. "And only sometimes."

"Right, because the rest of the time, he was being a freak in the sheets in there. Hopefully with your mother-"

"Okay, off." She was trying to shove him so, but he wasn't budging. "I'm serious."

"It was a joke."

"It wasn't funny."

"I love you."

"Paul-"

"My baby." He was shifting some more, to get over her better, moving his head from her breasts to the crook of her neck. "I's afraid of the dark and you were afraid of walking in on your freaky deaky parents."

"I'm gonna kill you." But her hands were tugging at the tie holding his ponytail up and, when it was out, she immediately knotted her fingers in the golden tangles. "You're so annoying. Ruined my questions."

"Ask me. What other children things do we gotta talk about? I didn't wet the bed, never had night terrors, didn't cut the head off animals-"

"Okay, I didn't think the last one would ever be necessary to ask, but now that you've brought it up-"

"I have no horrible traits that might be passed down to our future children." Lifting his head, he grinned. "Although I will say, the dentist was a bit scary."

"See?"

"I mean, I didn't think he'd pull all my teeth out or anything-"

"Shane told me-"

"-but it would always make my gums hurt," he continued on. "Like, they'd scrape them too hard and I hated it."

"Maybe if you tried brushing your teeth a time or two-"

"It wouldn't have mattered."

"He wouldn't have had to scrape your teeth if they were at least somewhat clean, you know."

"I know nothing."

"That sounds about right. You- Paul."

"Wha'?" he mouthed against her flesh as his hand continued to shove down into her shorts. "Steph?"

"Your game-"

"You gonna make me turn it off?"

"No, I meant- Stop it."

"Wha'?" His hand had snaked back up then, to slip up her shirt. "Steph?"

"Don't you wanna watch your game?"

"I can hear it," he reasoned, lifting his head once more so he could grin at her. "Unless, like I asked, you're gonna make me turn it off-"

"It's kinda rude, you have to admit," she mumbled as they both shifted then, to get more comfortable. "To listen to it during."

"Off it goes then." More moving around. "Just let me find the remote-"

"But it's fine," she said quickly, apparently not finding his hand as intrusive as she'd pretend to, as when he removed it, she moved to pull it back towards her. "So long as you can multitask."

"You should know how great I am at that, Mrs. Helmsley."

"Should I though?"

"I was able to have matches and still look out for you, wasn't I?"

"Uh, not to be a downer, babe-"

"When you're so good at it?"

"-but you kinda weren't so good at that," she pointed out as he focused more on himself then. Namely wiggling out of his shorts. "Remember? You asked me to stop going to the ring with you."

"That was because you were annoying as fuck." Then he grinned widely at her. "To Hunter, I mean."

"Uh-huh."

"I like all your neediness," he assured her as, even though he'd only gotten his shorts to his ankles, he came back to snuggle her up some more. "Makes you very lovable and cute. Like a puppy. So adorable."

Steph blushed slightly before saying, "I love the way that word sounds coming out of your mouth. Adorable. You say it weird. I don't think I've ever heard it from you before."

"It's not exactly the manliest word around, no."

"It's sexy though. Hearing you say something like that."

"Sexy, huh?"

"Super sexy."

"When I'm talking about anything? Or just you?"

"What other women are you calling adorable? Paul?"

"Literally never another one, ever, in my entire life." He nuzzled his head against her neck. "I meant more, like, if I saw a litter of kittens and called it adorable, could I be expecting a blow when we got back home or what?"

"Well, you shouldn't be expecting one right now-"

"This is bullshit."

"But it'd still be super cute of you."

"Mmmm," he groaned as one of Steph's hands came back up to his hair. "Am I adorable, Steph?"

"You wanna be?"

"Maybe."

"You're not really a puppy or a kitten, Paul," she admitted. "More like an...adult cat. You can be snuggled and held or whatever, but you kinda just put up with it and it's always with the threat of biting or scratching if done for too long. That's not really adorable. Maybe if you wore more hats-"

"You've taken the comparison too far. And I don't bite." Then he snickered. "Less you want, of course."

"Of course."

"Which is basically me asking just where you want my teeth."

"In your own mouth preferably, thanks."

But she was giggling and the TV wasn't loud enough, apparently, because he couldn't even hear it anymore. Or maybe he was just so focused in on his fiancee. Either way, when it was all over, Steph was left snuggled up under the blankets while he took a leak in the bathroom, being kind enough to leave the door open.

Steph's head was buried in a pillow though as she said, "You know, we were having a very important discussion about our future children."

"Who discusses children anymore?" he retorted. "These days, you just sorta squirt the kid out and deal with the consequences, babe."

"I'm sorry, which one of us is squirting out what exactly?"

"You know what I mean."

"I have a pretty sick visual, yeah, thanks."

"You wanna learn some deep dark, childhood secrets though?"

"After hearing that gourd thing? Not really, actually."

"I liked hearing about yours," he told her as, after flushing, he made a big show of washing his hands, just for her benefit. He didn't dry them though, so that he could rush back into the bedroom area and rub his wet hands all over her face. Steph only weakly fought him off while he said, "Like that bit about how your father was a sexual deviant and you couldn't even see inside your parents' bedroom-"

"You're not helping yourself here, you know."

"I know."

"It's normal too, to have that rule. Most people don't live in a house where you can just go wherever you want in it."

"But by making rules like that, Steph, you make people wish to. I didn't have that rule, so I never thought there was anything special about my parents' or sister's room. There was no reason to wonder about why I was banned."

"There was no wondering for me either. Because I knew what privacy was."

"I mean, I knew McMahons were weird, but-"

"It's normal!"

Paul was falling then, into bed with her, and Steph hardly moved to accommodate this, but that was fine, as he wanted her close to him then anyhow.

"So," Steph asked once they were settled into the bed, her resting more against him than not. The television had been shut off, before he'd disappeared into the bathroom, as the game was no longer of interest to either of them (though it hadn't been to her the entire time), leaving them in the dark then. "If our kid was afraid of the dark-"

"I thought we weren't having kids for, like, a long time?"

"Not immediately, we're not, no," she agreed, staring up at him then. "But we can still talk about it. If we only talk about the wedding, we'll get bored of it. Plus, these are, like, the final few months we're gonna get to learn stuff about one another."

"Only 'cause you wanna get married so soon."

"Do you not wanna be my husband, like, as soon as possible?"

"I do. I'd marry you tonight, if you were up for it."

"I'm not."

"I figured."

"I still can just call your mom tomorrow."

"Why though?" he grumbled as she patted his chest. "You saw her, like, a week ago. Or two. Or...whenever. After the show in New Hampshire."

"I went to lunch with her."

"That's my point."

"We're just close, Paul. You're gonna have to get over it."

"She doesn't know my early life like I know my early life."

"Well, your biggest reveal to me was that you like gourds, so-"

"Hate," he corrected. "Don't you listen?"

Marginally.

"My point," she kept up, "is that you aren't giving me much to piece together here."

"You asked me what I'd do if our kid was afraid of the dark," he pointed out. "My mother can't answer that."

"She seems to know you pretty well."

"Not well enough to know my actions. All of them, at least."

"Then what would you do? Huh? Paul?"

"Mmmm," he hummed as he wrapped an arm around her. "Probably something really parent-y."

"Parent-y?"

"Yeah. Real parent like. Parent-esque, even."

"That's not an answer."

"Just because you don't understand the answer, Steph, doesn't nullify it as so."

One of her hands came up to squeeze at his cheeks. "I think I love you too much."

"And my clear parenting skills?"

"Your lack of vocational skills, more like it."

"Vocation means, job, dummy. Has nothing to do with vocabulary. Now who doesn't know words good?"

"I think it's know words well."

"Is it?"

"It is," she tried to say, but it was most obscured by complete giggles and Paul nuzzled his head against hers and, wow, it was late. Too late. They were leaving Kentucky in the morning and needed their sleep. But it was hard to turn off, their connection, on nights when they were feeling it so strongly. "Babe."

"There is one parent skill I'll have to think about. You know, when I finally squirt one into you."

"Stop saying it like that."

"Whatever do you mean, Steph?"

Nuzzling her head into his chest, she asked, "And just what skill are you talking about anyhow?"

"I'mma let my boy pick out my tie. Every morning."

"Okay, first off, you teased me over that-"

"No, I teased you about your father's illustrious and adulterous sex life."

"You're about to have to sleep on the floor."

"Floor? Not another hotel room?"

"I'm too attached to you right now."

"Awe. Have some good dick and then you just can't resist keeping me close, huh?"

"And goodnight."

"You're no fun," he said as she rolled onto her other side, giving him her back. Which was for the better, honestly, if they were truly going to get any sleep. One of them had to initiate separation. Still, grinning at her back in the darkness, he said, "I'd let our kid sleep in bed with us. "

"Mmmm?"

"Yeah. I mean, not if they were, like, twenty or something-"

"Are we even planning to be together by the time they're twenty?"

"I'm getting married once, babe. How about you?"

He couldn't see her grin, but he had to know that it was there. "Same."

"Well, I mean, maybe twice-"

"Paul."

"What? If you die, I'm supposed to stay a widow forever?"

"Is that too much to ask for?"

Grinning himself, he gave her his back as well as he said, "So long as you're leaving me that McMahon money-"

"Or try to our children, that we'd hopefully have by then, but whatever."

"-then I think I can stick to fucking women and not marrying them. Sound pretty sweet, actually."

" _Goodnight, Paul._ "

"'night, baby." But he was laughing and he could hear her trying to stifle a giggle into her palm. "Goodnight."

* * *

 **I know I took a little break from you guys for a bit, but had some different fandom stuff tying me up. Back now though and, hopefully, with an update to In Sickness soon as well as some finished requests that have been piling up.**


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